What? Again?!
[Today's GinTama has two stories! The first story is about Sadaharu in hea...er, love.]
[The second story is about Katsura in hea...er, his delusions. "Drive With A "Might" Attitude."]
What's the matter, Sadaharu? Poop?
Good morning!
'Morning. That's a huge doggie.
["A Dog's Paws Smell Fragrant"]
He didn't finish eating again...
Gin-chan, Sadaharu has no appetite these days. He might be feeling ill.
Any dog that eats 5 bags of dog food in one sitting isn't feeling ill. He's just stupid.
He usually eats 7 bags.
Maybe he's exhausted from the heat? He does have fur on his face, you know.
Come to think of it, he's been looking at nothing but fashion magazines lately.
Maybe he's trying to change his look.
He does seem hot. Shall we give him a trim?
Then I'll do it. Sadaharu, I'll make you into a handsome stud!
He didn't finish eating again.
Gin-chan, Sadaharu still doesn't have an appetite. He must be feeling ill.
It's because you gave him a ridiculous cut. He's probably depressed.
That couldn't be. You look great, Sadaharu. A cool biz look.
I've never seen a dog with a cut that makes him look like a pro wrestler.
Come to think of it, Sadaharu's been looking at nothing but macho magazines lately.
Maybe he wants to build his body into a pro wrestler's.
He already looks rebuilt. By you, the mad scientist.
A pro wrestler, eh...
You don't have to do it.
How should we do it?
You don't have to anything.
He didn't finish again...
Gin-chan, it's no good.
You're the ones who're no good.
Why's a dog wearing a dog mask?!
It's as ridiculous as eating fried rice on top of fried rice!
It's not a dog! It's Wolf The Mask. His favorite technique is Poison Mist.
[Note: Based on Tiger Mask, a Japanese professional wrestling character used as a gimmick in manga in the 60's.]
Hey, hey, hey! There's the poison mist right now!
Shinpachi! Get some rags! Rags!
Yeah, okay.
Wolf The Mask, what's the matter? Cheer up...
It's no use. He's been interested in Hot Dog Press lately.
[Note: Magazine for young men. Articles include fashion and dating advice.]
The issue devoted to "Do it! Get That Girl!"
Hey, you think...
Oh, he's grown so big since I last saw him. How old is he now?
Two years old. He's so high maintenance.
I heard yours won at the recent dog show.
Oh no, that was just pure luck. Right, Betty-chan?
A monster!
You're creating a scene.
What is this? A matchmaking party for dogs?
House pets don't get many chances to meet other dogs.
It's like a social event for dogs.
Owners who want puppies find partners for their precious pets here.
Think there's a partner for our dog in heat?
Doesn't look like it...
But I'd like him to at least make a friend...
Looks like the dogs are being ignored.
There are mostly dog owners who came to socialize-bragging about their pets and such.
Some people come here looking to meet the opposite sex.
Socialites fishing for lovers using their pets as bait, eh?
Can't tell who's here to find a mate.
Um...Ma'am.
It's not what you think!
We didn't...
It's not what you think! It's not that! I didn't come here with any ulterior motives!
We said we never...
It's not what you think! I was just a little lonely! Seriously!
It's not easy keeping a pet, so I bought a mechanical dog.
It's so cute, I felt like taking it out with me to show it off!
[Note: Hasegawa is dressed as Captain Harlock/Juzo Okita from Space Battleship Yamato.]
That's really all it is! Seriously! I had absolutely no sick intentions...
What's this piece of junk doing?!
Hey! Madao! Look! Sit!
Gin-san, machines have a soul, too.
He must've caught his owner's obsession.
How shallow. A pet is like family. Using it to pick up women...
He must be lonely after his wife left him.
Oh, look there.
Haven't I seen her somewhere before?
She's, you know, the weather lady on Wake Up TV. Announcer Ketsuno.
So she's a dog person, like us...
Excuse me, could you and I... I mean my dog and your dog do it?
Do it?
He easily used his pet as a tool! And with a pick-up line a caveman would use!
I uh...always watch you on TV. I'm a fan.
Oh, thank you very much.
Gin-chan, she's fatter than she looks on TV.
I'm so sorry. She's just excited. Just so hopeless...
That hurt! Gin-chan, you said so yourself---that she put on weight after her divorce!
That sure is a huge dog. What's his name?
Wolf The Mask.
Such a masculine and strange name. Can I call you Wolf-chan?
Last of Mohicans Living of the Dead MacGuffin...
Say "Hi" to Wolf-chan.
Your dog has a name that's 100-times even weirder!
They can do it once, twice, it doesn't matter. But my dog is male.
Oh, that's all right. There are all kinds of ways. You are, after all, Ketsuno...Ana.
[Note: This is a play on the fact that Ketsuno-ana can mean butthole.]
That wasn't very nice! Not only was it not nice, it was awful!
A Frisbee?
Oh, we see this dog a lot on our walks...
Gin-chan, Sadaharu likes her...
Huh?
Hey, hey, what's so good about a girl with such a long body and short legs...
You have eccentric taste in women.
Sadaharu, were you always thinking of her on your walks?
Meru-chaaan!!
What the hell, you giant dog?!
What're you doing to my Meru-chan? Get away from her!
Ugh! That 70-30 part...
The Gutter Rat Gang's...
Katsuo the Black Piece
What?!
Yakuza!
Sadaharu, wait!
Stop! What're you guys doing with my Meru-chan?!
Boss!
I thought they looked familiar-they're those guys who live above Otose...
What?!
You guys don't give up, do you?! I hope you came prepared to die!
Wait, wait, wait! You've got it all wrong! That's not why we're here!
Seems our pet dog has feelings for your Meru-chan...
What?! What do you mean by "has feelings for"?!
He's in heat. One time's no problem, right?
One time, nothing! There's no way she can handle that giant dog's "one time."
Meru-chan just gave birth not too long ago. She can't have babies willy-nilly!
Kids?! What do you mean?! She comes with kids?!
Is she a divorcee?!
I can't give my Wolf The Mask to a girl with such a loose backside!
Come on, Wolf The Mask! We're going home!
Wait! Who're you saying has a loose backside?!
Dachshunds have very heavy backsides-that's why their legs are so short...
Boss! This is no time to be fighting!
Shut up! This is your fault for throwing that Frisbee way over here.
What?! They're on a boat! That dog knows how to date! He's no ordinary dog!
A woman knows she's with a man when she sees his rough hand shifting the transmission,
or his strong chest as he rows the oars!
Boss, he's not rowing!
After them! Go after them!
Protect Meru-chan's chastity!
That didn't work, Boss! Too many in the boat.
The boat's sinking!
Sadaharu, don't jump the gun!
If you touch a yakuza's woman, you'll be in big trouble!
I was once almost sunk to the bottom of the Edo Castle moat!
Meru-chan! Don't let him trick you!
The size of a man is measured by the size of his heart!
Back off, you two-bit thug!
I'm not giving up! I'll show you what happens when you underestimate a yakuza!
Kagura! Step on it!
You can't keep up with her power!
I'll just use you. It's effortless and much easier this way.
No, you don't!
What're you doing?!
Damn you! It's wrong to destroy public property! And you call yourself a samurai!
Shut up! And you call yourself a yakuza? Dummy!
No, you don't!
See ya...
I'm...taking you with me!
Let go of me!
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
That's a metallic dog, isn't it? What's his name?
Uh... His name is Madao.
I wanted him to be like Michael Douglas... That's the meaning behind his name.
[Note: In Japanese, Michael Douglas is pronounced MAikeru DAguresu. Thus, MaDa + O = Madao.]
Funny, right? You can laugh.
No, I think it's wonderful to put meaning into your dog's name.
What?
I didn't put any thought into my dog's name.
Right, Last of Mohican Living of the Dead MacGuffin?
Sounds like you put 100-times more meaning into that name!
Huh?
That's odd...
We fell into the pond and were drowning...
And then...
Did you just...?
That was very noble...
You ditched your date and dragged us all to shore, didn't you?
Yakuza are called bad guys, but we respect those who do the right thing.
I like you.
I'm willing to let you two start as friends.
You can date Meru-chan. Are you happy?
I see. Hey, Meru-chan, are you...?!
Meru-chaaan!!
And so, recent Bakufu activity... Recent... Bakufu...
Hey, did you see "Summer Sonata" yesterday?
[Note: Summer Sonata is a parody of "Winter Sonata" a very popular Korean drama.]
It was great.
I love the main character's smile.
Let me borrow a copy.
Rece...
Bakuf...
That's enough!
This is a forum for discussing our nation! This is not the time for gossip!
We're...sorry. We were discussing the popular NHSei TV show...
[Note: NHSei is a spoof of NHK (Nippon Housou Kyoukai) a.k.a. Japan Broadcasting Corporation.]
What?!
You're captivated by stupid shows from a foreign country!
And you call yourself samurai?!
Enough! I'm leaving!
Please don't! Katsura-san!
We're sorry, Katsura-san.
Katsura-san!
["Drive With A "Might" Attitude"]
Excuse me.
Is the videotape of "Summer Sonata" already out?
We don't have videotapes, but we have volumes 1 and 2 on DVD.
[Note: Posters say: My Neighbor Pedro and Alien vs. Yakuza.]
It doesn't matter which. I just want it.
We're a rental shop, so we don't sell them.
Rental? I don't quite understand, but help me out.
I'm having problems because I can't keep up with the latest topics.
Are you a member?
The name's not "a member," it's Katsura.
If you're not a member, you can't rent DVDs.
The name's not "DVDs", it's Katsura.
We can make you a membership card. Do you have any ID?
A student ID, or... Do you have a driver's license?
A driver's license?
[Oedo Driving School]
Excuse me.
I'm back again.
Don't tell me you're back again!
Sakata-san, how many times will you keep coming back until you're satisfied?
What did you do this time?
I'm sorry. I uh...hit...a ninja. They revoked my license.
How'd you hit a ninja that can run faster than a car?
That's about as likely as getting hit by a falling meteorite.
It's all thanks to your teaching, instructor.
I never taught you to do that. Are you trying to make it my fault?
I told you... Driving with a "probably" mindset doesn't work.
"It's probably okay. No one will probably jump out in front of me."
With that frame of mind, you won't be able to deal with sudden situations.
I've told you that driving with the "might" attitude is the way to go.
"A ninja might jump out in front of me. That ninja might make a right turn."
If you drive with that mindset, you'll be able to quickly deal with anything that happens.
Okay, get into the passenger seat.
What you're lacking is awareness rather than driving skill,
so we'll build your awareness by letting you watch someone else drive...
Okay? Today's lesson will be with another student.
How do you do? I'm Space Captain Katsura. Pleased to meet y-
Sakata-san, didn't I tell you to drive with a "might" attitude?
Your student partner might be a space captain.
You must put yourself in that frame of mind.
I'm sorry. I was a bit surprised, so I...
Quickly get in the car, Katsura-san. Please inspect the car before getting in.
Right.
There might be a ninja clinging to the bottom of the car.
The car might start suddenly while you're checking.
There might be a ninja hiding behind the car.
The car might suddenly back up.
Cut that out, damn you! I'm honestly here to earn my driver's license!
Katsura-san is here to get his license because he wants to become a video store member.
Where's the honesty?!
I'm here to honestly re-earn my license, too!
I absolutely don't want to be around you! Instructor, do something!
There might be a chance that two people who don't get along will ride with one another.
You see? It's the "might" attitude for both of you.
Foresee all possible situations and deal with each one as they arise, in a quick and safe manner.
Very good, Katsura-san. You handle the steering very well for a first timer.
But you're going a little too fast. Slow down before a turn!
You're too tense.
Too close to the steering wheel. That decreases your field of view. Move your body back.
Perhaps...
I might be nervous...
What kind of "might" driving is that?! It's not "might"! You're totally tense!
Hey!
Look out!
Slow down!
Sakata-san, the brake! There's a passenger-side brake in these student cars!
Perhaps...
An Anti-Foreigner Faction ronin might have rigged a bomb to explode if the speed drops below 50 kph!
[Note: Spoof of the movie "Speed."]
How complicated a "might" driving scenario is that?!
You're the Anti-Foreigner Faction ronin!
C'mon, instructor! What're you going to do about this?
This is why I was against this!
These things happen because this guy is serious to a fault!
Ack...
Next is...an S-curve! He doesn't even give a damn!
Perhaps...along the S-curve...
Our meals have become so lonely...
I wish we could've let Mother see Natsuko-san in her wedding dress.
She was so beautiful.
What're you talking about, silly?
Daughters aren't good for anything.
No matter how lovingly you raise them, they all go to another family in the end.
How heartless they are.
Oh? You still have a daughter right here, Father.
Matsuko-san...
It's not too late.
Why don't you find a nice man?
You are my son's wife, but that son is dead.
You have no blood ties to me,
so you have no obligation to keep looking after this old fool.
You're good-natured and good-looking.
You should be able to find any number of men.
You don't have to be concerned about me. I can manage by myself.
No one would marry an old woman like me.
Father, are you that intent on chasing me out?
No...that isn't why I...
If there's a good offer, I'll leave this house in no time.
Despite saying such a wry comment, the woman never tried to leave.
She looked after me, always nagging.
Haven't you done enough?
Do you still have lingering feelings for your late husband?
It's been seven years. You should live your own life!
Isn't it about time you took a step towards starting a new life with me?!
I'm always walking the path of my own life.
I'm not staying at this house because of lingering feelings or anything silly like that.
Then why? Is there another man?
It's because...
I have Father.
We may not be related by blood, but he is my Father...
...There might be moles like that under the road...
along the S-curve...
No way! And that was just too long a reason!
That's wasn't "might" driving or anything! It was just your delusion!
Sakata-san, thank you for stopping the car.
We must stop before a rail crossing...
Why're you crying
Please open the window...
There isn't one anymore.
You have to "might" drive here, as well. A train might come.
The crossing bar might come down. Listen to make sure.
Of course, this is a driving school, so there are no tracks,
and no train will pass, but please do it as a formality.
Yes.
No, wait!
I hear it... I can hear the sound of a train coming!
I don't hear it.
No, I can hear it! And the sound of the crossing bar coming down!
I can hear it clearly!
Hey, he's really lost it. Somebody call a doctor.
Ack! That's!
Father!
If I disappear... Matsuko can be happy...
If I move now,
I might get there in time!
You fool! What'd you do that for?! You were almost killed!
What good would your death do?!
Did you think that was what Matsuko would want?!
Matsuko would never be happy if she stayed with me.
I will certainly die before she does.
When that happens, what will old, alone and left behind Matsuko do?
I...I would be better off gone...
If I'm gone, Matsuko would be released from the shackles I have placed on her and be free.
That's where you're wrong, Father!
You're...Matsuko!
All I want is to be with you... Father...
Father...
Matsuko...
Father...
Father!
Sakata-san...
Yes?
Maybe we shouldn't be "might" driving anymore.
You might be right.
Ma...Matsuko...
Fath...er...
And so, recent Bakufu activity...
Let's leave that for now.
I happened to have watched "Summer Sonata" the other day, and...
Hey, did you watch yesterday's "Changam's Humiliation"?
[Note: Spoof of Dae Jang Geum: Jewel in the Palace, a Korean TV drama series.]
Summer...
It was great.
The main character's so brave, I cried.
TV...
Let me borrow a copy.
Summ...
T...
Cut it out! Listen to what I have to say!
Don't do that to me when I made the effort to watch the show!
Katsura-san, "Summer Sonata" is old now. "Changam's Humiliation" is popular now.
What?!
You jump from one new thing to the next.
I've had enough! I'm never watching another TV drama!
I'm leaving!
Katsura-san!
Please wait, Katsura-san!
Excuse me, do you have "Changam's Naked Body"?
It's "humiliation." Yes, we do. Your membership card, please.
I don't have one.
Then I'll create one. May I see some ID?
[Wanted: Anti-Foreigner Faction Ronin, Kotaro Katsura. Call 110.]
Use this.
[Preview]
We headed into the mountains in autumn hoping to make some money from matsutake mushrooms.
While we were there, we came across a giant bear known as
the "master of the mountain" and the hunter who pursues him.
The next episode...
"Think for a Minute Now, Do Matsutake Mushrooms Really Taste All That Good?"
[Marinosuke, a lonely hunter, pursues his rival, Masamune, the giant bear.]
[This week's stories were a bit you-know-what. But next week's story will touch your heart.]